Wednesday, January 18, 2017

My Momma

This is My Momma...


                            Jenny Ascension Muniz
                    August 15, 1942 - January 17, 2011








 My Momma...
the most caring, selfless, fun, unique and crazy lady I have ever known. She spent her life giving all that she had while also fighting demons that I will never know of and the ones I do know of  I will never understand. I do know she always tried her best and Always put others before her ALWAYS. Even when some of those the closest to her broke her heart the most. I am ashamed to say I was always a daddy's girl and  I never took the time to see how very much I am exactly like her in so many ways even the way I look. I never saw until she was gone. In big things and in small ...Almost daily I see my hands working and I see her hands not my own. As a child I could not understand so many choices she made, but now as an adult and a mother I see it clearly. It hurts so bad to know I cant pick up the phone and call her. During her last trip to visit me We had a long talk  I will always cherish, She told me she was sorry for a lot of things and That she was so amazed and proud of the person, wife and momma I had become. When I close my eyes and think of her I smile, and usually laugh. I can see her  running off... usually barefoot to go help someone with a ride, to take them money or food. I see her and my Dad dancing and laughing, while she would sing Tweedlee Dee to him by Laverne Baker. I see her making others laugh with her crazy sayings like "drunker than scooter brown"  and if she didn't like something she would walk away while flipping you off Yup...no sugar coating here. I can see her cooking Yummy foods in the kitchen, I see her sewing up my teddy bear for the hundredth time. But mostly how she was known, So many people we didn't know at her funeral spoke of her help and friendship. she was known for helping people Every Single Day! People She knew and Strangers too. I can remember her making Burritos and delivering to  Friends  she knew were lonely even the mail man and liquor store lady got one. She would go around to my Sisters, Aunts, Cousins and My Dads (they divorced but remained best friends)  homes, and pull weeds and tend to their Gardens, Collect Aluminum  cans and recycle for them. Leave a Dish of the food she knew was their favorite. And wash any dishes in the sink-That's how we Knew she had been for a visit. She would collect food and drive around and deliver it to People who could not get out or Neighbors she Knew were having a hard time.  I had the privilege of accompanying her on one of those trips and tear up every time I think of it, because I know these people appreciated the food but more so they craved the human interaction. She never left them without a smile.  She seemed to know everyone and would stop and talk to anyone (this is me) I laugh as I type this because I can hear my husband say -"You don't even know that person Row! T" Or If I hand cash to a homeless person I try to also give a hug with my hand and sometimes I cant help it but an actual hug- We don't know what the story is we only know they are struggling with their own demons. I often think one of my biggest faults is being to nice, I know I got this from my momma. and although her passing and a bit of hurts along the way in Life have made me at times, lock a gate around my heart I do try to let it open and carry on her ways, even if I really don't like pulling weeds lol  I miss you everyday momma.

2 comments:

  1. Sweet girl...there's nothing wrong at all about missing your mama...you miss her so much because you loved her so much...I am an old woman now, and, tho MY mama has been gone 30 yrs, I still miss her so much I can hardly stand it sometimes....I wish I could do something to ease my passing for my son and daughter..but she says, Mom, we will miss you because we love you...I had a great mom, too...she was talented in so many ways and she loved to have a few drinks every now and then...she didn't cuss but her favorite word was SHIT..and, like you, I think of these things and laugh....she was so much fun...

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    1. Thank you bj, your reply brought a smile and a chuckle-hugs

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